Who Are You’re Becoming? How Identity Shapes Every Choice You Make
We live in a world that often defines us by what we do: our jobs, our roles, our responsibilities. But beneath the titles and tasks, there’s a deeper question we don’t ask often enough:
Who are you becoming?
That single question has the power to shift how you live every day.
At Fit Vessels Total Wellness, this is where the journey begins. Because becoming is not about perfection — it’s about intentional alignment with who you truly are at your core.
Why I (Re)Started This Movement
For years, I felt stuck — showing up in roles that didn’t fit, questioning my decisions, starting and stopping projects, quietly wondering: Isn’t life supposed to feel more full than this? And yet I was busy.
Out of that tension, I (re)started FVTW. Not just as a business, but as a movement for women who are ready to rediscover identity, align their choices with their values, and live from a place of wholeness.
That’s why this space exists. Not to hand you a one-size-fits-all plan, but to remind you that you already carry the seeds of becoming within you.
Who You Are Now: Layers of Identity
Before we talk about who you’re becoming, it helps to pause and notice who you are right now.
Our personality and sense of self are shaped by many things: family, culture, experiences, and beliefs. But one under-recognized piece of our identity comes from the coping and defense mechanisms we developed over time to feel safe.
Maybe you became “the achiever” because approval made you feel secure.
Or “the peacemaker” because keeping everyone happy kept conflict away.
Or “the caretaker” because being needed gave you a sense of belonging.
These protective patterns aren’t wrong — they helped you survive. But they are not the full story of who you are.
Beneath the coping strategies is the real, natural you. The you that shows up when you’re not performing. The you that doesn’t have to prove, fix, or manage anyone else. That’s the identity worth rediscovering.
Identity First, Outcomes Later
When we focus only on outcomes — the next promotion, the perfect body, the dream relationship — we often miss the deeper foundation. True change flows from identity.
If you know who you are becoming, your actions naturally align.
If you don’t, you’ll keep chasing things that don’t fulfill you.
So let me ask you again: Who are you becoming?
Not what you do. Not your title. But you, at the deepest level.
Journal Reflection: Who You Are + Who You’re Becoming
Grab your journal and spend a few quiet minutes with this exercise:
Write down three words that describe who you are right now — including any patterns you’ve noticed that might come from coping or “performing.”
Write down one word that describes who you are becoming — the truest version of you.
Reflect: What would it look like if I lived more from that true word every day?
Weekly Gratitude Prompt
Gratitude keeps us anchored in the present while we grow into the future.
✨ Write down three things you’re grateful for this week — big or small. Notice how gratitude brings you closer to your natural self rather than your performing self.
Want to Go Deeper?
If you’re craving a safe space to unpack your identity in community, join us at SHINE 2025 — our one-day women’s empowerment retreat on October 25th. Together, we’ll create the space to be free, whole, and fully ourselves.
✨ Reserve your spot at SHINE 2025 here
With belief in you,
Ruth
